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Why did the chicken cross the road?

The chicken crossed the road because it was time for a CHANGE! The chicken wanted CHANGE!

My friends, that chicken crossed the road because he recognized the need to engage in cooperation and dialogue with all the chickens on the other side of the road.

When I was First Lady, I personally helped that little chicken to cross the road. This experience makes me uniquely qualified to ensure -- right from Day One! -- that every chicken in this country gets the chance it deserves to cross the road. But then, this really isn't about me...

The problem we have here is that this chicken won't realize that he must first deal with the problem on 'THIS' side of the road before it goes after the problem on the 'OTHER SIDE' of the road. What we need to do is help him realize how stupi d he's acting by not taking on his 'CURRENT' problems before adding 'NEW' problems.

Well, I understand that the chicken is having problems, which is why he wants to cross this road so bad. So instead of having the chicken learn from his mistakes and take falls, which is a part of life, I'm going to give this chicken a car so that he can just drive across the road and not live his life like the rest of the chickens.

We don't really care why the chicken crossed the road. We just want to know if the chicken is on our side of the road, or not. The chicken is either against us, or for us. There is no middle ground here.

Now to the left of the screen, you can clearly see the satellite image of the chicken crossing the road...

We have reason to believe there is a chicken, but we have not yet been allowed to have access to the other side of the road.

Although I voted to let the chicken cross the road, I am now against it! It was the wrong road to cross, and I was misled about the chicken's intentions. I am not for it now, and will remain against it.

That chicken crossed the road because he's GUILTY! You can see it in his eyes and the way he walks.

To steal the job of a decent, hardworking American.

No one called me to warn me which way that chicken was going. I had a standing order at the Farmer's Market to sell my eggs when the price dropped to a certain level. No little bird gave me any insider information.

Did the chicken cross the road? Did he cross it with a toad? Yes, the chicken crossed the road, but why it crossed I've not been told.

To die in the rain. Alone.

Because the chicken was gay! Can't you people see the plain truth?' That's why they call it the 'other side.' Yes, my friends, that chicken is gay. And if you eat that chicken, you will become gay too. I say we boycott all chickens until we sort out this abomination that the liberal media white washes with seemingly harmless phrases like 'the other side. That chicken should not be crossing the road. It's as plain and as simple as that.

In my day we didn't ask why the chicken crossed the road. Somebody told us the chicken crossed the road, and that was good enough.

Isn't that interesting? In a few moments, we will be listening to the chicken tell, for the first time, the heart warming story of how it experienced a serious case of molting, and went on to accomplish its life long dream of crossing the road.

It is the nature of chickens to cross the road.

Imagine all the chickens in the world crossing roads together, in peace.

I have just released eChicken2007, which will not only cross roads, but will lay eggs, file your important documents, and balance your checkbook. Internet Explorer is an integral part of the Chicken. This new platform is much more stable and will never cra...#@&&^(C% ......... Reboot.

Did the chicken really cross the road, or did the road move beneath the chicken?

I did not cross the road with THAT chicken. What is your definition of chicken?

I invented the chicken!

Did I miss one?

Where's my gun?

Why are all the chickens white? We need some black chickens.
Well we are officially moved into our new house.  
I swear I am never moving again.
It was a total murphy's law type of move. 
read the moving saga here...cut to spare those who heard it already....Collapse )
Oh and a few pics.  the babies are growing so fast!

We are moving on friday...so i will be busy with unpacking all the crap i just packed.
will update when back online!!
and pics



for those that do not know...the babies arrived on Dec 22.  
Gavin Christopher 5:30 pm 6 lb 1 oz

Madelynn Faith 5:32 pm 5 lb 9 oz
(gavin on left in this pic)

Madelynn on left in this one

Babies and I came home on Christmas morning.

We had a set back on new yars eve...I was having trouble breathign the day before.  I came home feeling pretty good but gradually began to feel poorly..and calle dthe Dr on the 31st.  I expected to get an antibiotic and be sent home, thinkign i had a bit of bronchitis.  Well I ended up with a CT scan and my lungs were filled with fluid.  SO I got sent to the ER.  My blood pressure was somethign crazy like 210/117...and they couldnt figure out why I was able to talk and walk considering what my scan looked like.  SO I got sent to the IMCU (which is one step up from the ICU) and was pumped full of meds, and on all sorts of monitors and had numerous tests....
End result was that my bp was out of control..sort of like post-eclampsia, and I was filling up with fluid, which was causing congestive heart failure.  lovely.  
I am now on several meds to help get rid of the extra fluid (I literally lost 10 lbs in 2 days ..amazing how much one can pee on a dieuretic!)  and to control my BP.  Things should get settled within a few weeks and I can come off the meds and get back to normal..or some semblance of it!
So it was a crazy week...I was in the hospital for 4 days...but I feel 10000 times better ..tired but better....
,more pictures of the babies to come...hopefully I can catch them both with their eyes open soon!  but right now I must go warm bottles and feed Gavin whi is squacking next to me!

So I happened to go into pcc the other day and saw that a friend had posted wondering what had happened to myself and elaine.  I replied to the 2 friends in the post about what is going on with me...and the fact that I have not spoken to Elaine myself in several months, and am concerned about her.  I checked my email today and there are some messages from ppl there asking how i am or wishing me luck with the pregnancy/babies...which is so nice!  HOWEVER there in the middle of them is an email from someone who I considered a friend...asking me to tell Elaine to return some of her clay stuff to her.  WTF?  No hi how are you, nothing..just asking me to yet again act as Elaines personal secretary.  This is not the first time this person has done this, in fact al of the contact I have had with this woman over the last 5 mo has been msgs from her asking me to tell Elaine this or that for her.  NEVER once asking how *I* am.   I mean if she really does not care about me in the slightest..fine.  however to have th enerve to *tell*  me to pass along a message for you is just outright rude, and news flash the world does not revolve around YOU.  If I were to suddenly hear from Elaine after over 2 months...the first thing I would ask her is not about your freaking clay stuff..but if SHE was ok.  

I am writing this here for several reasons.
1.  I need to vent and cool down before I reply to this person, because i really feel the need to tell her EXACTLY how I feel...and I dont want to bite her head off in the process.
2. Elaine if you happen to read this, I am quite concerned about you.  I thought we had become quite good friends..but your dissapearance from the face of the earth has me both angry and confused.  I hope with all my heart that you are ok and all is well with you and your family.  At the same time if you have just decided to cut ties for whatever reason couldf you at least let me know so I can stop worrying about you and get on with my life?
3. I know several of you who read this know the person who I am talking about.  Since I do plan to write to her I figured I'd put this out there...just in case there is backlash or whatever...so yall know where i stand.
4. I was hoping as I typed this and cooled down I would think differently but I dont...i am hurt and angry.  Perhaps you think I am being overly sensitive, but this is not the first time I have been contacted to act as a communication conduit for this person..and a few others as well.  Apparently I can fall off the face of the earth and for a few people the only loss would be that one of their means of communication with Elaine is cut off.  Have any of them tried to contact her to ask about me?  I doubt it!  I understand me not being on ppls radar and not thinking about how I am doing as part of everyday life, really I do ...we are just internet 'friends' afterall and real life should be top priority.  I have not been around pcc in a while because of the CTS issues, but also because I miss my clay SO much it is painful adn reading about other peoples fun is also painful, so I stopped 
To thos of you i have had passing contact with ..thank you for at least taking the 3 seconds it takes to ask how I am.  I know I have not been around and perhaps am missing out on important things in your lives..and I am sorry if you needed support and I was not there to do that.  But the few seconds you have taken to ask a simple how are you means a lot...as obviously some people who I thought cared a little bit, dont at all
Dear Billy Mays,

We all know what a fantastic cleaning product OxyClean is.  I have even tried Kaboom and indeed it is one of the best bathroom cleaners on the market.  We get the message.  Please please STOP SCREAMING AT ME FROM THE TV!

yours truly, 
Carolyn Jordan
Well lately I have been having very vivid dreams...I hear that it often happens during pregnancy, something about those lovely hormones...

Anyway last night I spent a good chunk of time with this :

SO perhaps my subconscious wanted to hear sweet noithings whispered in an Aussie accent..who knows.  I'll take it (Sorry Nicole Kidman I was just borrowing him.)  Coulda been worse...coulda pulled up these Aussies:


well at least my subconcious has reasonable taste and knows Id rather have the first than 4 loons singing 'fruit salad ..yummy yummy.." to me in my dreams :)